Many parents admit that they love their children very much, but when work, financial and childcare pressures pile up, they easily get angry and say harsh words. Many words spoken in anger seem like "teaching children to be careful" but can make children lose confidence, fear and form distance with their parents.
Young children are very sensitive to words. A scolding may make the child silent at that moment, but the hurt can last very long. Parents' frequent use of negative language also clearly reflects failure in emotional control and educational methods.
Below are 7 common sayings that many parents often utter when angry, but they are more harmful than beneficial.
1. "You always do wrong
This saying makes children feel useless and never good enough. Gradually, children will lose motivation to try because they think they are being criticized for everything they do.
2. "Why can't I be like other people's children?
Comparison is a "poison" to children's self-esteem. Children will feel looked down upon, jealous or insecure, and even develop a psychology of opposition.
3. "Mom has said it many times but still doesn't listen
This sentence easily puts children under pressure and fear. If repeated too much, children will develop a feeling that they are always disappointing their parents.
4. "You can drive mom crazy
This is a saying that makes children think that their existence is a burden. Children may blame themselves and feel that they do not deserve to be loved.
5. "Im ngay
When asked to remain silent in all situations, children will gradually lose the ability to share emotions, fear expressing thoughts and withdraw.
6. "Mom doesn't need you anymore
Although it is just words in anger, for young children, this is a very big fear. Children can be haunted and develop feelings of being abandoned.
7. "It's all my fault
Blaming children entirely makes children feel guilty, easily form a psychology of inferiority and grow up with the fear of making mistakes.
How to avoid uttering words that hurt you
When feeling out of control, parents should pause for a few seconds, take a deep breath or leave the situation for a while to calm down. If you need to give advice, use short, clear sentences and focus on the wrong behavior instead of denying the child's personality.
Raising children properly is not about never being angry, but knowing how to control emotions so as not to turn words into wounds in children's hearts.
