In the program "Sisters Solve Problems", Ms. L called to express the pressure of returning to her hometown for Tet and facing "inappropriate" questions from relatives and neighbors about salary, when to get married, etc. "Sometimes when I hear those questions, I feel very frustrated, if I don't answer, I will be said to be naughty, and if I answer, I don't know how to answer", Ms. L was confused.Listening to Ms. L's feelings, MC Phuong Uyen sympathized because every Tet, she encounters similar situations.
The female MC shared: "Listening to the audience's story, I thought this was my own story.I can also feel the voices of my relatives and neighbors echoing in my ears".Singer Hai Yen Idol also encountered a similar situation.
Recalling the time after participating in the Vietnam Idols competition, she was busy singing and doing extra office work, the female singer faced a lot of gossip and criticism about financial issues.
The singer of "More than once" recounted the question of an acquaintance: "Oh my god, you must be rich because you sing and work at the same time. How much money do you give your mother each month?" This question made the female singer fall into a state of confusion because to her, finances are a private matter, very difficult to share socially.
With questions of a private nature, in addition to the factor of concern, MC Phuong Uyen thinks that the questioner has a jealous mindset, examining the situation to compare with their children. However, singer Hai Yen Idol has a more positive thought, she expressed: "That is just one of the polite questions and has become a cultural custom during Tet or family reunions, not because people have the intention to pry or have any purpose."
Dr. To Nhi A (lecturer at Ho Chi Minh City Central Pedagogical College) said that the "lethal" questions during Tet are because they want to "attack".
She analyzed: “Maybe they don’t like you, so they start asking you private questions, from there using the content as an excuse to attack you, making you feel frustrated when listening, thinking and answering them.” According to the female doctor, before answering “inappropriate” questions on Tet, the person being asked should determine whether the other person is interested or has another purpose in order to answer and behave cleverly.
Dr. To Nhi A instructed: “You can answer gently like: “My salary is enough to live on, when the time comes, I will get married.” However, if you don’t like being asked about these issues, you can add: “Okay, next time I see you, don’t ask me these questions anymore, when the time comes, I will let you know.” If a person doesn’t have bad intentions, they will understand because you have made a commitment, reminding them.
However, when you proactively update information but the next time you meet, people still ask about this issue, you need to filter it out and to avoid affecting your mood, you can refuse. Or you can be firm and say that you are not happy with their questions.
