From a young age, we were trained to win. Win against classmates by points, win against neighbors by a more beautiful car, win against colleagues by a higher position, win against ex-lovers by posting luxurious travel photos on social networks. The older we get, the longer the list of battles becomes. Some people win in society, but in the evening they lose the refrigerator full of food after the weight loss vow. Some people win in the business world, but lose a fit of anger, when the ego is too big, or lose their own loneliness.
Lao Tzu said: "Looking for victory over others is chaotic, looking for victory over oneself is peaceful.
Because, after all, most of the chaos in a person's life stems from being too concerned about others. People buy a phone not because they need it, but because they are afraid of losing to friends. People rush into a marriage not because of love, but because they are afraid of losing to their married friends. People stay up late working until exhausted not necessarily because of passion, but because they want to prove they are better than anyone. And life becomes a strange race, where no one remembers where they came from and does not know where to go. They only know that if others speed up, they must also speed up. If others succeed, they must be more successful. If others are happy, they must be happier. The result is chaos in thoughts, in emotions. Chaos in sleepless nights when seeing others seem to live better than themselves. Ironically, the most difficult enemy to defeat has never been another person. That enemy is right in us, is hot temper, jealousy, fear, self-doubt, greed, procrastination habit and even the ego that always likes to be caressed.
You once read somewhere that, if you want to know how strong a person is, don't look at how many people he has defeated, and whether he can remain silent in the face of an insult or not. Overcoming yourself is often much simpler actions. That's when you intend to get angry but decide to remain silent, or when you want to give up but still try a little more. That's when you know you don't need to prove your worth to anyone, or accept that there are people better, richer, and more beautiful than you and that doesn't make your life worse at all. In the end, after so many years of struggle, people realize a lovely paradox of life. Winning over others sometimes only brings a few minutes of glory; but winning over yourself brings true peace.
