In many families, marriage is a topic that parents often mention when their children enter adulthood. The concern, if prolonged and becomes pressure, sometimes makes young people psychologically avoid it.
Ms. Nguyen Hoang Anh - Psychological Consultant (Voice of Therapist Office) - said that this is a fairly common psychological reaction, called "psychological reaction". When a person feels that their right to self-determination is threatened or interfered with too much, they tend to want to regain control by delaying, avoiding, or even doing the opposite of what is expected.
Most young people want to make decisions at a time when they are truly ready, instead of getting married just to please their families or meet social expectations," the expert analyzed.
According to experts, today's younger generation also has a different view of marriage. They consider marriage an important decision that affects their whole life, so they often carefully consider suitability, financial ability, emotional maturity, career orientation and parental responsibility.
Therefore, procrastination is sometimes not irresponsible but a desire to better prepare for married life.
To avoid creating more pressure, expert Hoang Anh recommends that parents should shift from pressure to companionship. Instead of constantly mentioning marriage, parents can proactively listen to their children's thoughts, concerns and needs, thereby creating opportunities for both sides to exchange more openly.
Parents can start with questions that show interest such as: "What are you thinking about getting married? What are you currently wondering about? What can parents help you with?" instead of constantly asking "When will you get married?", the expert suggested.
According to experts, the difference lies in one side being pressure, and the other side being opening up dialogue opportunities. When listened to and respected, young people will have space to consider when to start a family as well as what needs to be prepared for married life.
Parents also need to respect each person's developmental pace. Not everyone has the same time of maturity in emotions, finance or career. Comparing children with siblings or peers often only increases feelings of inferiority and distance.
More importantly, experts emphasize building relationships so that children feel that family is a safe place to share, not a place where every time they return they have to face questions that put pressure on them.
