From beautiful images to the reality of marriage
Before getting married, many young people often imagine married life through beautiful love stories, trips together or happy family images shared on social networks. However, when entering a common life, the responsibilities and differences between the other person are gradually revealed.
Ms. Nguyen Thi Thanh Ha (28 years old, Hanoi) said that before getting married, she thought that husband and wife would have more time for each other like in love. However, after getting married, work and family responsibilities changed quite a lot in life.
When in love, two people can always spend time sharing or have weekends to go out together. However, after getting married, each person has a job, has their own worries, so they don't always maintain the romance as before. There were times when I felt quite disappointed because reality was different from what I had thought," Ms. Thanh Ha shared.
Similarly, Mr. Tran Minh Quan (30 years old, Hanoi) believes that social networks also made him have quite ideal images of marriage.
On the internet, we often see couples giving gifts, traveling, taking care of each other. But in real life, there are also money, housework, work, and times when the two people disagree. I think if we expect marriage to always be happy, without arguments, it is very easy to be disappointed," Mr. Quan said.
According to Mr. Minh Quan, after getting married, the important thing is not to try to keep everything the same as when we were in love, but to learn to adapt to changes in our common life.
Reasons why young people are easily disappointed in marriage
According to psychologist Mai Viet Duc (Nhan Hoa Viet Counseling and Psychological Therapy Center), social networks are contributing to shaping how many young people perceive love and marriage. What is shared is often beautiful moments, while pressure, conflict or sacrifice behind rarely appear.
Young people often see trips, gifts, words of love or happy family moments, but it is difficult to see pressures on work, finance, housework, childcare and times when two people disagree," psychologist Mai Viet Duc analyzed.
Psychologists also say that frequent exposure to selected images can cause young people to unconsciously form excessive expectations about marriage. They may think that a happy marriage must always be romantic, harmonious and less controversial. Therefore, when the first conflicts appear, many people easily feel disappointed or think they have made the wrong choice.
Besides, changes in the environment and lifestyle after marriage are also a cause of disappointment for many people. When in love, two people often have more time for each other and less common responsibility. After marriage, work, financial, family and children pressures can change the way two people interact.
Disagreement does not mean a failed marriage. The important thing is whether two people can talk, listen and find ways to solve the problem together or not," expert Mai Viet Duc said.
According to experts, young people need to see marriage more realistically, instead of taking images on social networks as a measure of their life. A good marriage is not a marriage without problems, but a place where two people know how to face and overcome arising problems together.
