Marriage breakdown due to money matters
Many couples enter marriage with expectations of financial transparency, considering it a foundation for building trust and long-term attachment. However, in reality, the money story, which seems very clear through numbers, has become the starting point of many rifts.
Mr. Nguyen Ngoc Minh (32 years old, Hanoi) said that his family's conflicts sometimes start from differences in spending habits. According to him, when two people have different views on money, harmonizing is not as simple as he thought before getting married.
I prefer to save, and my wife wants to enjoy life more. At first, it was just small expenses, but over time it made both of us uncomfortable because of the feeling of disagreement," Mr. Minh shared.
Meanwhile, the story of Ms. Dinh Thi Lan (29 years old, Hanoi) shows another aspect of the financial issue in marriage. Ms. Lan shared that her belief was affected when she discovered that her husband had a debt from before but did not mention it during the process of getting to know each other or after getting married.
I was shocked to learn that my husband had a personal debt from before without saying it. What makes me sad is not the money, but the feeling of not being trusted to share," Ms. Lan said.
According to Ms. Lan, if the story had been told earlier, the two could have completely found a way to solve it together. However, keeping the information secret makes the problem more serious. Because it directly affects the feeling of safety and trust in marriage.
Financial transparency needs to go hand in hand with trust and discipline
From a financial perspective, Ms. Nguyen Thi Hong Van - Financial Advisor, FIDT Investment and Asset Management Consulting JSC - believes that finance in marriage is not simply a revenue and expenditure problem, but also directly related to deep personal aspects, which are not easy to share.
According to experts, the biggest barrier lies in the psychology when having to "open up" your entire financial situation.
Finance has many hidden corners, such as credit debt or personal assets before marriage. When sharing, each person must reveal their weaknesses, so if trust is not enough, it is very difficult to open up," Ms. Van said.
Not only stopping at the element of transparency, differences in views on money are also common causes leading to conflicts in married life.
Everyone has their own financial reference system, formed from living habits, family environment and personal experiences. Some people prioritize saving, others want to enjoy it. In addition, everyone wants to have a part of financial independence, so many couples still maintain their own spending funds," Ms. Van analyzed.
In that context, the approach to financial issues also needs to change towards being more flexible and oriented. Instead of starting with controlled or questioning questions, couples should lead the conversation from common goals in the future.
Two people should talk about goals such as buying a house, investing or planning for children. From those goals, financial steps need to be determined," the expert added.
