Not resting and relaxing because of saving and worrying about children and grandchildren
Mr. Vang (64 years old) has a pension of more than 20 million VND per month. Current life is quite fulfilling, there are not many expenses when his children have grown up, and his job is stable. Therefore, Mr. Vang wants to relax and travel to some places with his wife at a suitable time. This was difficult to do before because Mr. Vang and his wife, Ms. Thuy (60 years old), work in two different places, rarely going out together.
Being busy with work, we only have short trips, we cannot travel far together for many days. Now I want my wife and I to have trips to experience together, because in a few years we are afraid of not having the strength to travel," Mr. Vang said.
According to Mr. Vang, trips do not need to be luxurious or expensive, but simply for husband and wife to experience together somewhere. However, on the contrary, Ms. Thuy believes that the lives of her children are not really stable, when one is paying in installments to buy a house, the other is paying in installments to buy a car... Therefore, they still need to save as much as possible to be able to support their children.
The views of both were not wrong, but from then on debates began to arise. She blamed him for not knowing how to save, because he had lived like that before, but now he wants to spend without calculation. And he blamed her for only knowing how to save, only thinking about children and grandchildren and forgetting about the life of the couple.
Harmony measures when both taking care of yourself and supporting children
It seemed that the argument between the couple would not come to an end, but the opinions of the children harmonized the conflict, so that the couple could find common ground.
According to Mr. Minh - son of Mr. Vang and Mrs. Thuy, currently the children have stable jobs and lives, so parents should take better care of their lives. Instead of focusing on taking care of their children and grandchildren, parents should have their own relaxation, because if there is something to do, the children can still find ways to manage on their own.
The children's opinions made Mrs. Thuy seem to wake up. After that, the couple decided to organize a small trip, bringing joy to both the elderly couple.
In a happy mood after the trip, Mr. Vang and Ms. Thuy began to recalculate the monthly expenses to cover. After discussing, the two agreed to divide the pension and income after deducting monthly expenses into many portions for appropriate goals.
In which, a part is used as a reserve safety fund, not used for ordinary expenses; a part is used to support children, but only in necessary cases; a part is for travel and relaxation for both husband and wife... Thus, Mr. Vang can still travel within the agreed scope; Ms. Thuy is still assured because there is a fund to support her children and grandchildren.
“Previously, I thought I had to take care of my children and grandchildren as much as possible. But later I realized that we should only provide support within a certain scope because the children also have their own lives. At the same time, we also have to have our own relaxation space for both husband and wife," Ms. Thuy said.
This is not a rare story among older couples when retiring, because they often have to consider between enjoying leisure or accumulating for their children and grandchildren. However, it is not necessary to choose one of the two, but there needs to be harmony. In which, there needs to be a clear plan, priority must be given to ensuring life; then comes the matter of supporting children and grandchildren, and how to support it appropriately.
