Raising children to think independently is a long process, starting from very small interactions in daily life. According to experts, this skill is not formed naturally but needs to be nurtured through the way parents react, guide and accompany their children in each specific situation.
According to expert Claire Lerner, who used to hold a strategic role at ZERO TO THREE (USA) - a leading research unit on child development, parents should not rush to intervene when children have problems.
Parents' task is not to solve all of their children's difficulties, but to help children have the skills and confidence to handle their own problems. Intervening too quickly can make children lack the opportunity to learn how to think independently.
A simple but effective way is not to intervene immediately when children encounter difficulties. For example, when children play with block-shaped toys, instead of helping, parents can guide them verbally so that children can find their own way to handle them. These experiences help children train observation skills and form independent thinking from an early age.
Dr. Stephanie Irby Coard, professor of human development and family studies at the University of North Carolina at Greensboro (UNC Greensboro, USA), said: "Teaching children to be independent starts from childhood and needs to be adjusted according to each stage of development. Parents should create opportunities for children to explore themselves instead of over-controlling.
Children learn a lot to think from observing their parents. When parents explain the reasons for daily decisions, children will understand how to see and analyze problems instead of just following suit. This helps children know how to ask questions and form logical thinking early on.
In addition, listening before giving advice is also very important. When children are told their thoughts, they feel respected and more confident in making decisions. Listening helps children learn how to organize their thoughts and see problems more clearly.
Parents can create hypothetical situations for children to practice thinking. Questions like "what would you do in this situation?" help children learn to analyze and choose solutions. Activities such as chatting, telling stories, or discussing in the family also contribute to developing thinking and critical thinking abilities.
More importantly, children need to understand that mistakes are natural in learning. When parents and children find the cause instead of correcting them immediately, children will learn better lessons. When they are no longer afraid of mistakes, children will be confident in doing new things and developing independent thinking.
Independent thinking does not come from big lessons but forms through the way parents accompany them every day. When children are listened to, do it over and over again to find the right way and are respected for their thoughts, children will gradually know how to make their own decisions and be more confident in life.
