Many times when he wakes up, he still feels like he is living alone. When they were in love, they both swore many things, said that one person was the source of life for the other. But after marriage, after a few years, perhaps both realize that people cannot live on promises. The so-called "source of life" of the past gradually became a familiar companion. Want to find another source of life? Maybe. It's just that at this age people understand that all searches will return to themselves.
He has a wife and two children in high school age. Husband and wife live together like long-time friends. He still remembers to buy medicine when his wife is sick, still runs out to park his motorbike every time his wife comes home from work. The only thing is that marital intimacy is gradually decreasing over the years. He said his wife is in poor health, no longer interested. As for him, from someone who was once full of desires, to the age of U50, he also feels that whether he has it or not, it's okay. A very strange person, anything that is missing forever will be quenched.
He asked him if he ever planned to have an affair outside. He boasted that when he was young, he was very romantic, there were many beautiful girls pursuing him, even many married girls wanted to leave him to come to him. But in the end, he chose a woman with ordinary beauty to be his wife. And then, he read many Buddhist books. Not to become a person of enlightenment, just to gradually understand that each choice has its price. So he stopped sowing seeds that he knew in advance would have to pay the price.
Now, his joy after work is just a cigarette, a cup of tea and a moment of sitting still with himself. He said that when his heart is calm enough, the outside world can no longer stir much. When the mind is at peace, storms will not disturb him. He jokingly asked if he is a vegetarian, he shook his head. Every week he still drinks with friends for a few meals. "Those things are just a hint.
Hearing him say that, I suddenly thought that perhaps maturity is not about becoming a different person. It's when people stop chasing after things that used to make them flutter, stop trying to prove something to life and accept living calmly with what they have.
