In many families, children grow up with high expectations: to be good, to be good, to be like other people's children. It is these invisible role models that make many children hesitant and not dare to express what they have. Helping children develop their strengths is therefore not only a matter of education but also a way to build a healthy, warm and respectful home.
Listening, the key to opening the door to confidence
Children will not be able to express their strengths if they feel judged at first, says Dr Hannah Collins, a child development psychologist at the University of Melbourne (Australia). What you need is simply a safe place to be told, to be wrong, to try without fear of being criticized.
Therefore, parents should proactively create a space to chat every day: ask their children what they like to do, what makes them happiest, what makes them feel shared. When you listen honestly, you will be surprised because you turn out to have abilities that adults often lack, from observation, storytelling ability, to perseverance in small things.
Assign your child the right tasks, so that you can shine properly
A family that knows how to nurture their children's strengths often starts with very everyday things. If you are good at it, give your child a kitchen assistant. If you are bold, let your child be the spokesperson on small family occasions. moderate tasks not only give children the opportunity to express themselves but also instil in them the belief that they are valuable.
Children need to experience the most intimate sense of success, which is family, Dr. Collins emphasizes. Commending your child at the right time, clearly and specifically also contributes to strengthening confidence. Instead of saying So good, say I make this egg very skillfully, you like the way you season it. Detailed compliments help children understand where they are strong and dare to promote.
When parents value the spirit of encouragement more than the expectations, children will grow up in confidence, naturally shine in their own way.
