Lawyer advises on the wife's right to work after many years of quitting her job as a housewife

Reader L.K. T (in Ninh Binh) asked: "My husband and I have been married for 7 years, have 2 children, one 6 years old, one 4 years old. When I got married, my husband worked as a construction engineer and I worked as a saleswoman for an office equipment business company.

After getting married for a year, I gave birth to my first child. Two years later, I also gave birth to my second child. Two "chicken eggs, duck eggs" children, both parents are far away, so taking care of the children is quite hard. At that time, my husband suggested that I quit his job that according to my husband, "the salary is not equal to his coffee money" to stay at home as a housewife and take care of young children.

Thinking that hiring someone is expensive, the salary for being a maid is more than my salary when I go to work, and I am not as assured as taking care of my children myself, so I decided to quit my job at home. Several years of being around the house cooking, children, it was really boring. But busy with children, house, cooking, all kinds of unnamed tasks and then the days passed.

This year, my children have all gone to school, so I feel even more inferior and backward at home. I discussed with my husband to go back to work, but he did not agree. He said that the important thing for women is housework and taking care of children. Moreover, I have quit my job for a long time, now it is difficult to find a job, even if I can find one, the salary is not worth it. It's better to just stay home and take care of the children and family, the economy is taken care of by him.

I don't want to be stuck in four walls forever. I never studied properly, now just staying at home as a housewife is a waste of studying. My husband and I exchanged words many times every time I mentioned going back to work.

Not wanting my husband and I to be stressed, I told my husband that if I don't go back to work, I will sell goods online. This way I can both earn extra income, not be bored and still have time to take care of children and family. Hearing me say that, my husband got angry, saying that women like me are only suitable for housework, don't know anything about business to do. Even my husband cursed me for imitating, seeing others do it and also "following". These days, my husband and I have had very tense conflicts.

Now I don't know what to do to change my husband's rigid thinking. I heard that the law stipulates the equal rights of husband and wife, but it is not clear how it is regulated. Can I use the provisions of the law to argue with my husband? I would like to get advice from a lawyer.

Regarding the legal issue you asked, lawyer Duong Thu Hien - Thanh Lam Law Company Limited (Hanoi Bar Association) - advises as follows:

Article 23 of the 2014 Law on Marriage and Family (amended and supplemented in 2025) stipulates the rights and obligations regarding studying, working, and participating in political, economic, cultural, and social activities specifically: "Each spouse has the right and obligation to create conditions and help each other choose a career; study and improve their cultural, professional, and nghiệp vụ qualifications; participate in political, economic, cultural, and social activities".

In addition, Article 12 of the Law on Gender Equality stipulates gender equality in the economic field as follows:

“1. Men and women are equal in establishing businesses, conducting production and business activities, managing businesses, equal in accessing information, capital sources, markets and labor sources.

2. Measures to promote gender equality in the economic field include:

a) Enterprises using many female workers are entitled to tax and financial incentives according to the provisions of law;

b) Rural female workers are supported with credit, agricultural extension, forestry extension, and fishery extension according to the provisions of law.

In addition, Clause 2, Article 40 of the Law on Gender Equality stipulates violations of the law on gender equality in the economic field, including:

“a) Obstructing men or women from establishing businesses and conducting business activities due to gender stereotypes;

b) Conducting commercial advertising that is detrimental to business owners and traders of a certain class.

Thus, according to the provisions of the law on Marriage and Family, husband and wife have the right and obligation to help each other choose a career. Along with that, according to the provisions of the law on gender equality, men and women have equal rights in production and business. Your husband does not want you to work or sell online, believing that women are only suitable for housework is wrong and violates the provisions of the law.

Your husband's actions may be subject to administrative penalties according to the provisions of Decree No. 76/2026/ND-CP dated March 16, 2026 of the Government amending and supplementing a number of articles of Decree No. 125/2021/ND-CP dated December 28, 2021 of the Government stipulating penalties for administrative violations in the field of gender equality. Specifically, Clause 1, Article 5 of Decree 76/2026/ND-CP stipulates:

Article 5. Amending and supplementing Clauses 1, 2 and 3 of Article 13 as follows:

1. A fine of between VND 5,000,000,000 and VND 10,000,000,000 shall be imposed for one of the following acts:

a) Obstructing or not allowing family members to engage in income-generating activities or meet other family needs for gender reasons.

......

To solve your problem, you and your husband should sit down and talk to each other. You analyze and persuade your husband to understand that, in addition to housework, you have the right to do the work you love. Your husband's obstruction not only disrupts family harmony but is also an act of violating the law. Your husband should support and help, so that you have the conditions to do the work you desire. If your husband still does not create conditions for you to go to work or do online business as you wish, you can ask a grassroots mediator to mediate and persuade your husband to change.

The above is the advice of the lawyer. Wishing you to soon solve your problems.