When love is no longer clear
It is not always the end of a love that there are loud arguments or breakups. There are relationships that keep passing silently and hastily - where the two are still together, but are no longer really "by each other".
Ms. Lan Anh (Tay Ho, Hanoi) shared that she and her boyfriend have been together for nearly 4 years. They were very in love and had planned to get married. But recently, every date with a lover has become something Lan Anh wants to delay. The messages passing back and forth are gradually decreasing, and the stories are only left with politeness.
"I don't know if it's because I'm too tired of work or because I don't love anymore. He is still a good person, but I feel like I don't want to try harder for this relationship like before," Ms. Lan Anh honestly said.
The cold gradually occurs in marriage. Mr. Minh Tuan (Dong Da, Hanoi) has been married for 6 years and said that recently, he and his wife have lived as two friends in the same house.
"We don't argue but we don't have intimate conversations. Sometimes they don't say anything to each other for a whole week other than needing to resolve the matter. I also don't know if this is a normal quiet or an alarm sign," said Mr. Tuan.
Temporary love can overcome if we strive together
According to educational psychologist Bui Thi Hai Yen - Director of NHC Vietnam Psychotherapy Center, the state of "love is love" can happen in any relationship, even when love is still there. The important thing is to distinguish whether it is just a temporary period or a real end.
"The line between temporary love boredom and cold affection lies in the level, frequency and changes in attitude and behavior - are they obvious and last a long time?" Ms. Yen analyzed.
If a person still wants to maintain a relationship, they will find a way to refresh their emotions, rekindle the connection: invite each other out, share frankly, or change their behavior.
On the contrary, when no one wants to try anymore, silence becomes the default, everything is just an obligation - that is a sign that love is over.
The key difference is effort. When they were in love, people still wanted to save them. When love is over, people just wait for an excuse to let go, Ms. Yen emphasized.
