A friend just "deposit" the new apartment yesterday, this morning there was a set of color photos posted on Facebook. The post received many " likes", "heart", congratulations, and "very good" compliments. The friend said: "Just show it off, because I don't sleep at night, putting my hand on the forehead thinking about where to borrow the remaining money, what to do to pay off the debt, it's very hard".
The problem is not that he was wrong to show off, but that we were forgetting: It was just a very small piece in their lives.
Of course, among those who like, give compliments or give compliments, deep down, there are still many people who are building a fire of jealousy. For example: "My salary is the same, my social position is similar, why am I still renting a house now, haven't I seen any opportunities to have a better place to live?".
In fact, when we put our entire real life into a moment of careful editing by others, we will always find ourselves inferior.
Comparison is a primitive thinking mechanism, used to position oneself. But in the era of social networks and information being optimized to attract attention, this mechanism easily leads to fraud. It makes us react to a wrong signal while still believing that we are thinking correctly. A person posted a photo of buying a house, we saw that we lost. A person who shows off his high income, we find ourselves un talented. But we don't see the debt behind it, the time to trade it off, or the level of stress they are hiding. The problem does not lie in the other person, but lies in us forgetting to check the input of the comparison.
This situation is even more serious when it comes to money. Because money is easy to measure, people should use it for comparison. However, they do not measure the risks, time and associated health losses. Big win investors often don't say how much they have spent, and everyone is easily attracted to the destination without wanting to learn the road. We enter the game not because we understand, but because we are afraid of being left behind. Each action no longer comes from personal goals, but from emotions stimulated by others. We leave our board and play on their board where the rules are not for us.
In fact, each person is paying a different price for what they choose. Some people choose to work less, have a moderate income, but sleep peacefully and live well. Some people choose high salaries and many opportunities, but in return, it takes personal time and constant pressure. There is no right or wrong but only a suitable one. But if we keep looking at and seeing ourselves as inferior, we will never feel enough, even though we are living up to what we once dreamed of.
Comparison, if not controlled, it will not help us understand where we are but only cause us to lose direction. It is no longer a tool for evaluation, but has become a source of psychological harassment. Like trying to use someone else's map to reach your goal, it seems correct, but you can never reach the finish line.
The only way to avoid a railway failure is to return to the personal problem. What do we live for? What do we accept in exchange? What do we see as enough? When these variables are clear, we will no longer be swayed by others' edited slices. Because in fact, everyone is editing something, even those who we think they have everything.
well, "good is showing off, bad is covering up" is still a very normal thing.
