At the program, Ms. Q (29 years old) confided that she has been married for 6 years and has a 5-year-old son. Her husband has a higher income but often goes to work, so she is the "key to the family". Currently, the mother and child live in a maternal house to facilitate work and save family expenses. The couple's life is independent, taking care of the house, children, and even tuition for their brother-in-law.
However, the husband's family in the countryside, despite having land and gardens, was always in a state of deprivation, often begging for money, not paying attention to grandchildren and also caused the couple to carry the debt of her parents-in-law from repairing the house. After much urination, Ms. Q felt dissatisfied because she had to take care of her husband's family more than her own, feeling sorry for her parents-in-law's superstition when their children were sick but kept demanding. Ms. Q loves her husband but is tormented by his passiveness towards the family. She wants to find a way to "ignore" to live more comfortably, while at the same time wanting her husband to be able to set limits for his family and respect his wife more.
Sharing about her views, artist Phuong Dung emphasized: If it were me, I would not choose to live a blind life but would clearly solve everything. I will talk directly to my husband and my husband's family, because I am the one holding the finances. I will clearly explain the couple's income, family expenses, parents' deposits, and her brother-in-law's education expenses. The parents did not say that they wanted to change it to make people look big. But if there is any need to send money back, in my opinion, you should say it clearly and decisively once. Because your husband is passive, you need to stand up and solve it. If this situation continues, we will always be in debt.
Recognizing Ms. Q's actions of wanting to "ignore" her husband's family to have a more comfortable life, Phuong Dung analyzed: "He wanted to ignore not sending more money, and he also said that he had contributed and had borne the debt for that house. Like Phuong Dung's mother, I don't want to live in one house or another, I really have to borrow money. But because that is my mother, I can't be around her anymore. Whether it is my mother-in-law or my biological mother, I should do it if I have a debt.
Regarding the solution, artist Phuong Dung said that Ms. Q should talk frankly with her husband. "When there are conflicts with the mother-in-law, the one who can resolve them can only be the husband. Because anyway, her husband is her mother's child. The husband will be the one in the middle to get along, so that the mother-in-law and the wife can get along well together, the female artist said. However, she emphasized that the wife should not neglect her responsibility, but should not meet all requests from her parents-in-law unconditionally, leading to her family having to bear additional debts.
