At the end of November of the lunar calendar, when buses returning to their hometowns begin to become more frequent, many families are stirring to discuss cleaning up and preparing for Tet, then for many young people, a feeling of anxiety also silently appears.
Turning off the computer at 10 pm, when the office lights were almost completely off after a day of completing the project, Nguyen Ngoc Mai Thanh (27 years old) - an office worker in Hanoi - turned on the phone. In the family chat group, a series of messages appeared, revolving around the upcoming Lunar New Year plan.
The day before, when I returned to my hometown for a death anniversary, I just sat down and didn't have time to finish drinking a glass of water, relatives asked'when will you get married?','don't you bring your lover home to meet me?'. It's only the end of the 11th lunar month and I already feel pressured, let alone the Tet days," Ms. Thanh shared.
It is not difficult to see the situation where many young people choose to return home late, stay for short days or try to avoid crowded gatherings at the end of the year.
For them, the period of time supposed to rest and connect family becomes a prolonged period of stress before Tet.
According to the sharing of many young people, marital pressure comes not only from the questions "when will you get married?", but also from invisible comparisons.
Friends of the same age have married and given birth, while I am still single, struggling with work and personal goals. Hearing too much, I naturally feel confused, even though I had never thought I was'single' or had any problems before," Ms. Thanh admitted.
These seemingly unintentional comparisons easily make young people fall into a state of anxiety and self-doubt, feeling that they are slowing down compared to the social standards that family and relatives still implicitly set.
According to Ms. Thanh, in her hometown, the concept of getting married early to stabilize life is still deeply ingrained in the minds of many generations. For parents, the fact that children are not yet married means worrying, worrying about children being lonely, worrying about no one taking care of them, worrying about being too old, missing out.
Meanwhile, young people today have more choices. They prioritize career, personal experience, self-development and desire a marriage based on emotional, financial and responsible readiness, instead of marrying just to be'old enough' or to please their parents," the 27-year-old woman added.
Many young people admit that repeated questions about marriage make them stressed, tired, and even fall into a state of mild depression.
To Thanh Van (25 years old, working in Hanoi) shared: "I feel very young. But my family is worried, matchmaking from person to person. I don't know how to refuse politely, and hearing a lot is also stressful.
According to Van, the end of the lunar year, after all, is still the time for families to be closer. Instead of pressing questions, many young people want to receive listening, respect and understanding from their loved ones.
