Don't worry when love faces opposition from family
Many young people enter love with the expectation of understanding and supporting but face the biggest obstacle when the relationship reaches the threshold of family introduction and discussing the future.
Opposite opinions, whether directly or just half-heartedly, are enough to make many people fall into a state of hurt, self-consciousness and confusion about the path ahead.
The case of Bao Phuong (24 years old, Hanoi) is a typical example. After nearly 2 years of dating, when they first met for the boyfriend's family, contrary to Phuong's excitement, she received coldness. The reason given is that he is a freelancer, has an unstable income and is not suitable for being a daughter-in-law.
'Although not directly scolded by my lover's family, half-hearted words and economic questions make me feel unyed,' Bao Phuong shared.
Family pressure makes Bao Phuong's boyfriend gradually become silent and avoidable, while Phuong falls into a state of inferiority and fears that the relationship has no future.
Another case is Tuan Vu (27 years old, Hanoi) who fell in love with someone 5 years younger than him but in a different region. The girlfriend's family strongly objected because they were concerned about cultural differences, lifestyle and geographical distance.
Although we love each other very much and want to get married, my girlfriend and I keep falling into a spiral of tension, anger and helplessness, even thinking about breaking up to free each other, Tuan Vu said tiredly.
Maintain a relationship when love faces opposition
Psychologist Mai Viet Duc - Nhan Hoa Viet Psychotherapy and Counseling Center - said: "Parents' objections often come from their instinct to protect their children, not necessarily their hatred for their loved ones. It could be the worry about your child's economic losses, stability, fear of conflict-prone lifestyle differences, or the expectation of a safer choice."
Under this pressure, the most important thing is the unity between the two. If the couple turns to blame and blame each other, the relationship will weaken, the expert emphasized. The two need to calmly discuss, focus on the problem and avoid direct confrontation when the stress is high.
In addition, those involved need to protect their personal emotions. Being easily opposed makes many people believe that they are "not good enough", thereby reducing their self-worth.
"Young people should redefine their value, put limits on excessive attacks, seek support from friends, lovers or experts, and maintain physical health care to maintain mental stability", said expert Mai Viet Duc.
In communication with the family, the goal is not to paint the right or wrong but to create a sense of security. Listen before explaining, prove it by action, maintain a polite attitude, avoid defensive reactions and take advantage of the role of a bridge of the lover as ways to help narrow the gap.
Patience, kindness and maturity over time can gradually transform opposition, concluded expert Mai Viet Duc.
