From victim to focus of scrutiny
Behind the status lines accusing and exposing adultery online are personal stories full of hurt, where insiders both want to tell the truth and unintentionally push their private lives to the public's dock.
Ms. Minh Anh (27 years old, Hanoi) still remembers vividly the day she exposed her husband's infidelity on social networks.
I discovered messages and intimate images between him and others. At that time, I didn't think much, I just felt frustrated and needed a place to vent," Ms. Minh Anh confided.
Initially, she felt comforted because many people commented on attacking the third person, encouraging her to try to overcome it. But after many days of being exposed, it became a tiring story.
Both families were affected because neighbors gossiped and blamed me for my thoughtless actions, making me even more self-pitying and haunted. I didn't think my actions would affect so many people," Ms. Minh Anh said.
Or in the direction of the story of Hoang Linh (35 years old, Quang Ninh) also makes him think a lot. He is the person who was exposed for adultery by his ex-lover, even though the two had rifts and broke up before.
I was surprised to see my personal images and stories appear all over the groups," Mr. Hoang Linh shared.
Although he did not publicly respond, he said that his life has been greatly disrupted, directly affecting his work.
Exposing adultery and prolonged trauma behind the screen
According to psychologist Mai Viet Duc - Nhan Hoa Viet Center for Counseling and Psychological Therapy, people who are betrayed are prone to extreme anger, loss of emotional control, acting to "relieve anger" rather than to heal. People who are criticized often live in anxiety, fear, loss of sense of security, and even avoid society.
''From there, both sides are easily drawn into a vortex of comparison and judgment, causing prolonged damage instead of being resolved'', the expert emphasized.
According to experts, insiders should temporarily stop social media for a while, avoid making hasty decisions. Insiders need to handle injuries in private spaces, where there is emotional safety.
''Publicly exposing adultery does not make oneself feel more comforted. It is necessary to prioritize self-healing, not turning one's own pain into a collective judgment'', expert Mai Viet Duc said.
From victims of betrayal, many people become the focus of judgment on social networks. When personal pain is exposed publicly, the hurt not only does not diminish but also risks prolongation, making healing more difficult.
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