Ms. Nguyen Thi Nam (character name has been changed) is over 70 years old this year. All her life she has been a farmer, when she was healthy, she never thought about how she would live when she no longer earned money. Because the money earned when she was young also took care of her children's education, there was no surplus.
Now, with poor health, she cannot work in the fields as before. The money in the house is taken care of by her children. Every month, her daughter gives her a sum to spend. But that amount must be calculated very carefully, because her daughter also has her own family, and two children are of school age.
Sometimes if I want breakfast, I have to call and ask my child. It's not that my child doesn't give it, but I'm embarrassed. My child also has a lot of things to worry about," she recounted.
What makes her even sadder is not the lack of breakfast money. That is the feeling that she used to be the one taking care of the whole family, but in old age, if she wants to buy anything, she has to consider whether to ask for a child or not.
Expenses in the countryside sometimes also make her feel awkward. The village cultural house mobilizes contributions, village roads, and small amounts of money to serve community activities. Every time village officials announce, she remembers it in her head, and then waits until her child comes home from work to dare to call.
There are only a few tens or hundreds of thousands of VND. But I don't have my own money, so I still have to ask my children for it. Many times I'm very shy," she said.
It can be seen that when young, workers often think that just raising children, building a house, and having a piece of rice field is enough to feel secure. But when old age comes, things that were once considered full cannot be converted into a regular monthly income.
Without a pension, Mrs. Nam does not have a fixed amount of money to proactively spend. All expenses from medicine, food to arising matters depend on her children.
The scariest thing for her was not the months when her son gave less money. She was afraid that one day her son would also encounter difficulties.
My children are also struggling now. I don't want to become a burden to them. But I'm old, if I can't make money, where can I rely on?", she said.
In many families, elderly parents without pensions are still living on the care of their children. When they are healthy, they can earn extra income by taking care of grandchildren, gardening, raising livestock, or doing small business. But when their health declines, that source of income also disappears.
There is one thing very difficult to say in old age stories: Elderly people not only need to be supported by their children. They also need the feeling that they can still decide their own lives.
Mrs. Nam said that she does not expect her children to give a lot of money. "Just having a separate amount each month, even if it is not large, I also feel more comfortable. If there is something to do, I take care of it myself, not calling my children for everything.
Listening to that saying, I realize that sometimes what parents need in old age is not a life that is too full. They only hope that in their last years, they still have a little money in their pocket, a little decision-making power and do not hesitate every time they want to ask their children about money.
