Then one day, he no longer had enough energy to perform. He began to turn himself and realized: Most of the desire for recognition comes from the fact that we have never recognized ourselves. Carl Jung once said: Until you make the subconscious become conscious, it will control your life and you will call it fate. The need to prove stems from the fear of being unconscious: Fear is not good enough, not important enough, not enough to be loved.
He has a friend, before every conversation was filled with these achievements. Not because of showing off, but because I am afraid of being scolded. There was a time when you fell in love with a serious relationship because you had to maintain your "form". Until you are exhausted, you quit your job and return to your hometown for a few months. There, no one cares about what you have done, only knows that you are a child in the family. No one needs you to prove it. For the first time, you are comfortable in yourself. When you come back, you talk less, laugh more.
Buddha teaches: Suffering from acceptance. We are dependent on our image in the eyes of others. Accept that it must be recognized. Accept the idea of being better than others. And so he suffered. He has witnessed a woman who spends her whole life fighting for her family and people say. When she got sick, she stopped, started saying no, and started choosing herself. At first, people reacted. But then they learn to respect her as an independent individual.
When he loves me more, he is not selfish. He was less scared, less afraid of losing heart, less afraid of being abandoned. And at that time, love is free, without invisible conditions.
He used to have a former colleague who always tried to interfere in every project, giving non-stop opinions just to affirm his position. People were scared but didn't really trust me. On the contrary, his current boss, who only speaks when needed and listens more, is the one with the most prestige to be quiet. The boss never needs to speak out to prove himself right; his calmness and thoughtfulness speak for themselves. Abandoning the need to prove is the key to shifting from oral power to presence power.
This is a beautiful paradox: When you stop trying to force others to see your value, that value naturally shines.
