People often imagine alertness as a state of absolute peace, no more anger, no more suffering. But then you suddenly understand that alertness is not the absence of emotions, but the ability to clearly recognize each emotion that is arising, whether angry or sad. You realize that you are living with those emotions, seeing them clearly, understanding them clearly, but not letting them identify or drift you. You are not anger, or disappointment, but just someone experiencing them.
You realize you are frustrated. But that frustration does not necessarily mean finding a person to express your anger. You simply feel frustrated, and understand that this feeling will pass. You get over your anger not by suppressing or extinguishing it, but by allowing it to be present, clear enough so you are not controlled by it, light enough so you do not hurt others. Provincial awareness, it turns out, is not about not being hot, but about knowing that you are hot but not acting according to it unconsciously.
Amidst the sparkling pieces and unfinished coffee scent, there is the complete presence of an imperfect person, but clearly understand how that imperfection is happening. Accepting an unsatisfactory start to the morning is a form of meditation: Accept that fatigue, frustration, and unwanted things are an inevitable part of life, and they do not need to be pushed away or hidden. We can welcome them as uninvited guests, observe and let them go.
Provincial awareness is not to sit still in the midst of a storm of emotions, but to be alert enough to know what is in you, and have enough courage not to turn that emotion into hurt for yourself or others. It is the act of cleaning up debris without tearing it, eating breakfast quietly without seeing any Emptiness.
The broken cup this morning was not just a simple incident. It is a lesson, a test of presence. And when you wash another cup, not to replace or forget the old one, but to be ready to accept if another broken cup occurs, then you have truly understood what it is like to live in alertness. That is the peace of mind when facing unpredictability, the ability to accept everything as it is, without judgment, without resistance.
