Being a parent is not a role. It is a harsh real life role, where every wrong decision can leave a mark in the heart of a child, but it is also a place where every act of love can touch the most beautiful depths of human personality.
There is no ideal model for raising children. But there is an unchanging principle: children need a father and mother who are present, kind, and dare to accompany them.
No need to be a right father or mother
Modern society makes parents fall into the mystery of "childhood standards" - from social networks, books, to parent groups. But the more they pursue that ideal model, the more people move away from their true self.
You don't need to be like a father on TV who is always patient, or a mother in books, in movies who is always gentle. You just need to become the most sincere version of yourself, so that your child can grow up with an imperfect father and mother who is consistent, kind and real.
From love to letting go is a process
One of the most difficult skills for parents is learning to... let go at the right time.
From the time the child was toddler, until he chose the school himself, chose a career, and then decided the path of life, his parents had to learn how to step back. Not to withdraw, but to give children an adult space, tried, wrong and learned from their own stumbling.
The greatest gift parents can give their children is not a lifelong shield, but the steadfastness when they step out of that shadow.
Education does not start with words but with lifestyle
We can tell our children hundreds of things, but what truly shapes their personality comes from the way their parents live every day.
When parents know how to love themselves, children learn the value of self-respect. When parents know how to apologize, children understand that mistakes are not worth being ashamed of, and hiding them is scary. When parents live well, children will immediately have kindness as a natural thing.
Being a parent is an example. And the child, even though he did not say anything, was still observing the smallest details.
When your child is "difficult to speak", ask questions instead of judging
Children do not always act according to adults' expectations. But behind each "incomprehensible" behavior is an unspoken thing: an hurt, an anxiety, a desire to connect.
Instead of screaming, criticizing or dropping the rules, try asking:
What is going on in your heart?; What do you need from me right now?; What makes me so angry/sad?...
When parents learn to be curious instead of imposing, questioning instead of teaching, that is when the relationship becomes a safe support, where children dare to confess, dare to be weak, dare to make mistakes and dare to grow up.
Being a parent - the journey of courage and kindness
In a turbulent world, parenting is a more difficult choice than ever. The pressure from life, from colleagues, from social networks makes many people confused between love and expectations, between responsibility and limitations.
But it is in the most challenging days that fathers and mothers need to choose to be patient instead of angry, understanding instead of imposing, and above all, listening to themselves to avoid losing their identity in the journey of raising children.
