The perfect husband online, the devil manipulates in real life
He is a nightmare in real life, a nightmare online - that was a tearful confession of Ms. Minh Anh (28 years old, Dong Da, Hanoi) when talking about her husband that she met through social networks.
At first, he talked deeply, always listened to me, sent sweet words of encouragement. Every day he sends messages asking about, sharing good music, books, and movies. I believe that I have met the ideal man, said Ms. Minh Anh.
After 8 months of online love and in-person getting to know each other, Ms. Minh Anh got married. But just a few weeks after the wedding, her husband's true face gradually became clear.
I read and steal my phone, control every call, every message I send to friends and colleagues. Every time I react or complain, he threatens to commit suicide and smashes my belongings. I was scared, cramped, and lived insecurely, Ms. Minh Anh shared.
Not only Ms. Minh Anh, another case is Ms. Thanh Ha (30 years old, Bac Tu Liem, Hanoi) who also fell into a similar tragedy.
Ms. Ha met her husband through a dating app, attracted by his elegance and thoughtfulness. But after getting married, Ha's husband strictly controlled his spending, forced his wife to quit her job, and cut off contact with her biological family.
He never shouts loudly, but every word he says is criticizing and defaming me, making me gradually lose confidence and not dare to decide on anything, like a puppet in the house, Ms. Ha said bitterly.
Each victim needs to identify and escape the invisible trap
Talking to reporters, Dr. Nguyen Thi Tuyet Minh (Institute of Journalism - Communication, Academy of Journalism and Communication) emphasized: "Psychological confusion in love, marriage is a form of mental abuse. That is when a person tries to control the other person's thoughts, emotions and actions to serve their own interests''.
According to Dr. Nguyen Thi Tuyet Minh, manipulation people often use sophisticated tactics such as: sowing guilt, making victims skeptical about themselves (gaslighting), cutting off social relationships of the opponent. They cause victims to gradually lose confidence, self-respect, and the ability to make independent decisions.
The ultimate goal of manipulation is to maintain power and control in relationships. Escaping from such a relationship is not easy because the victim's will has been eroded, even depending on the manipulation," said Dr. Nguyen Thi Tuyet Minh.
Dr. Nguyen Thi Tuyet Minh emphasized: "The most important thing is that the victim must realize that they are being manipulated and dare to take the first steps to save themselves".
